I’m still mildly out of it, after getting up at 5AM Pacific time for the last three days (for a school visit, then an airplane ride, and then work…) and I still haven’t unpacked or uploaded pictures (two very necessary and logical next steps to returning from a trip.)

All I’ve done is find a JACKPOT of books in the basement my sister left behind in her many moves, many of which I’ve come very close to buying in the last few months, because I didn’t know where her copies were. I now have SO MUCH READING to accomplish before June between the rest of the Teach for America reading (I’m halfway done!) and all these books I’ve found.

Here’s a semi-complete book list. Any thoughts on what I should read first:

Cat’s Cradle – Kurt Vonnegut
The Lovely Bones – Alice Sebold
The Jane Austen Book Club – Karen Joy Fowler
Little Children – Tom Perrotta
IV – Chuck Klosterman
Brave New World – Aldous Huxley
The Post Birthday World – Lionel Shriver 
Me Talk Pretty One Day – David Sedaris (Technically, I would be reading this for the second time…) 

And of course, one teaching book: The Essential 55 – Ron Clark (Yes, of the wonderfully amazing TV movie “The Ron Clark Story.” And it’s signed!)

Coming up next: a small trip recap with pictures!

Yes, in the last week and a half, I’ve plowed through all four of Stephenie Meyer’s novels, and yes, even went to see the movie a second time. (I mean, I had to see it now that I really understand the story. I have to say, it was definitely better when I understood why Edward looks like he’s in pain for most of the film…)

I know I’m way behind the curve on this one. Twilight talk was EVERYWHERE in November, but I was kind of wrapped up in my last semester of college, and now that I have nothing but free time, I no longer had an excuse. I really didn’t want to give in, but my love of all things pop culture forced me to understand what all the fuss was about. Now I finally get to have an opinion! It’s a complicated one, but here goes:

I can’t say I think the books are good, but I also definitely can’t say they’re bad either. I mean, I couldn’t put them down. Even with my ridiculous love of getting completely wrapped up in a book, that fact says a lot about the story. And there is the distinction I have to draw: the books present an amazingly engrossing story.I couldn’t wait to see what happened next. Stephenie Meyer says herself she considers herself more a story-teller than a writer, and I think that’s an apt description, because as wrapped up in the story as I was, I still found myself cringing at points, especially in Twilight, at the repetitive language and overly fluffy writing. I know everyone has said this, but if she had described Edward’s heart-stopping beauty one more time, I thought I was going to throw the book out the window. That said, I wouldn’t have because I HAD TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED! It was mildly frustrating. Especially because I wanted to find myself above the books: I wanted to hate them. And I didn’t. I enjoyed them. A lot. Damn you, Stephenie. 

(EDIT: I was told by my mother I should pause here for a brief SPOILER ALERT in case I’m not the last person to read these books.)

There were more things I found frustrating: the feeling all through New Moon that nothing happened (and when it did, it had nothing to do with anything that had happened thus-far in the book), Edward’s ridiculous perfection but also his mild creepiness (I mean, he’s wonderful and all, but if a real guy acted like him, I would probably be telling him to take a giant step back…), the fact that Bella and Jacob kept having the same good-bye scene over and over and over again, the slight creepiness of the Jacob-Renesmee situation in Breaking Dawn…

While on the subject of Breaking Dawn, I was told by all my friends who had read the book that they hated it, that it took so many weird turns, so maybe I was prepared, but I didn’t hate it. I mean, I found problems with all the books, so Breaking Dawn pretty much fell in line with my expectations. Yeah, the whole pregancy, having to drink blood, baby-breaking Bella’s ribs thing was weird and a little scary, but I thought it was kind of cool. I mean, in a vampire book, it had to get creepy eventually. It’s amazing it took this long to get bloody, when you actually think about it. Plus, I loved that in the end, Bella really did have to become a vampire to live, and I was happy to get to see that transformation. It felt gratifying. The thing that bugged me the most was that the timeline felt really compressed (did anyone else think they talked about the events in New Moon like they had happened years rather than months beforehand?), but it all made sense, I suppose. I also think, like with Harry Potter, this was definitely not a young adult novel…at all. Despite all these frustrations, though, I have to say again, I liked the books. It’s weird. I don’t think I’ve ever been this torn about enjoying a book before.  

There is SO much more I can say, but I really need to break away from this world. It’s been totally engrossing to me, and I’m glad I finally feel caught up on pop culture after putting it off for a while, but I need to get some other things done that Edward Cullen has kept me from. Up next, I promise, I’ll finish my trip recap!

I do have other things to report in my current life, though. It’s looking like, for now, I’ll be staying at home for a little while. The thought of packing and “moving” back to Boston for the few months before graduation, right now, is nauseating after my month of travel and suitcase living, not to mention my numerous moves over the past four years. To combat the boredom I know is coming, however, I’ve undertaken some projects.

The first is weight loss. Inspired by some real-life friends and stealing ideas from Jen, I signed up for Weight Watchers Online. I always say I want to lose weight, but something else always take precedence, like school and friends, you know, little things. Now, however, the only job I’ll have will be stress-free, I assume, and I have access to free food and a free gym, so why shouldn’t I take advantage? Plus, I don’t really try hard to eat super well, yet I’m not really overweight, so if I put in some effort, I think I can knock off a few pounds. I’ve been on it for two days, and it’s been tough. I snack ALL THE TIME. Anyone who knows me knows Goldfish Crackers are my life, so that’s been the toughest thing to cut out. All those little fish add up to points I can’t part with. Also tough: working out yesterday for the first time in a month. I almost passed out in a kickboxing class, and today I could barely get out of bed I was so sore. I’m trying a different class tomorrow, but now I’m determined to get through a kickboxing class, just because it so kicked my ass. I’ll definitely keep you updated. 

Another bandwagon I’m a little ashamed to have jumped on: Twilight. I got a gift card to Barnes and Noble from my cousin for Christmas, and I saw the massive display of Twilight stuff  yesterday, and outwardly reasoning that if I’m going to be teaching middle schoolers English soon, I should see what they’re interested in (this was achieved by buying a book recommended by TFA called The Art of Teaching Reading as well), but really just wanting to be able to know what all those posts about Edward Cullen were gushing about, I picked up the first book. I’m already 100 pages in, and all I’ll say at this point is that it’s much better than the movie, which did not impress me. I get sucked pretty easily into books, so I’m not expecting to be above the craziness. Again, I’ll keep you updated. 

So that’s all in my normal life for now. I’m currently looking for a job, but nothing’s happened so far. I’m definitely not complaining. So far, I’m enjoying the rest. I mean, today, I get to sit home all day and watch inauguration coverage, which, by the way, is INSANE. Has there ever been an inauguration people were this genuinely excited about? It’s amazing and inspiring and exciting that people are this hopeful and happy about one of our leaders. Even if you don’t like Obama, you have to acknowledge that what he’s done for so many people in the country and for the general feeling in the country is fantastic. That being said, I’ve never disliked Bush as a person, and right now, I’m kind of happy for him. I feel like he is probably so relieved to be done. Now he can go hang out on his ranch, clear his brush, and no one can say anything to him about it. In that way, I feel like we share a nice little connection. We’re both taking a break after a lot of hard work. Mine  may have not have been as serious, but you know what I mean….

As for what I missed writing about, my Thanksgiving break was relaxing and overall, really fun. Thanksgiving day was spent cooking and chatting with my Aunt, who is a librarian at a school similar to one I’ll probably be teaching at next year. I also watched my cousin’s dog scare the bejesus out of my cat and ate some delicious food. All in all, a successful Turkey Day. 

Friday, I finally got my hair cut and colored (for the first time in August. *shudder*) and now of course, I look fabulous. Then  my family took an impromptu trip to Rehoboth Beach for dinner at Dogfish Head Brewery. Our waitress let us know that the town’s Christmas tree lighting was happening that night right down the street, so, of course, we had to go and mock the small town charm of it all while making crazy faces for a series of portraits. (Photos can be found here.) We’re clearly a special bunch.

Saturday, Steph and I somehow made our way to King of Prussia mall, which is oppressively large, where I bought some wonderful new flats and saw Danny Bonaduce! Twice! No joke. He was wearing freakishly tight pants. 

Sunday was filled with reading, relaxing, and watching The West Wing online with Stephanie. After finishing American Wife, which I ended up loving as much as Prep (which is to say, a lot – I highly recommend both), I of course had to go buy MORE books. This time, I went with some teaching books from a list Teach for America sent me.  

And now I’m back, and, thanks to my mom’s sickness through this whole break, a little sick. However, I will NOT let this ruin my last two weeks of college, because frankly, I’d rather be a little sick now than in two weeks when I leave for AUSTRALIA! Woot! 

Speaking of which, I’m going to be gone for about a month (3 weeks in Aussie then 1 week in LA), and I’ve already talked to my sister about helping me out with some guest posting around here, but if anyone else is interested in writing a little something while I’m gone, let me know! 

And, I think that’s it for this mildly ADD wrap up. Happy Tuesday!

This week alone, I bought the hardback copy of Relentless Pursuit and finished it in three days. Then I decided it would be a good idea to go buy another book before heading to work to sit around and do nothing, so I picked up Malcolm Gladwell’s new book, Outliers, yesterday. 

Sadly, I’m already halfway thorugh it. I knew that would happen when I bought it, but I couldn’t bring myself to buy two hardback books in one day, so I waited on purchasing the next book I’ve been dying to read: American Wife. Sadly, I know I’m going to finsih Outliers tonight and will probably go out of my way tomorrow to pick up American Wife so I have something to read on the train ride home Wednesday morning.

I blame my dwindling course load. Seriously, I had absolutely nothing to accomplish this weekend for my classes…or my senioritis and the fact that I basically have a guaranteed job now have caused me to feel like I had nothing to accomplish this weekend. Oh well. I’m enjoying all the reading, even if my wallet isn’t. I’ll write some reviews when I finish up both books. 

It’s called Relentless Pursuit: A Year in the Trenches with Teach for America, and it actually follows four ’05 corps members through their first year in the program. I hesitated before purchasing it, wondering if I really wanted to take in an account of what my life could be like – gritty, terrifying details and all (especially, as no matter how journalistic the author’s intentions may be, she is still writing a book and needs conflict, and I assume, tended to gravitate towards the more dramatic, compelling [and thus more frightening  me] stories.) Despite all that, I ended up buying it and reading it all last night and at work today. 

I was 100 pages in when a Program Director from the LA office called me last night. Unfortunately, 100 pages in, the ’05 corps members were deep into their “What the hell am I doing here?” phase, which may have colored the percentage I gave the PD when she asked what my odds were of accepting versus rejecting. (I told her I was about 80/20, when really,  I’m probably more 95/5.) She was extremely helpful, though, not pressuring me and really giving me all the information I asked for. I definitely felt better after talking to her. She told me the story of how she cried gonig to the airport to training, thinking “What if they made a mistake when they picked me? What if I’m not really cut out to do this?” Then, when she got to induction, the first thing the TFA staffer told them was “We didn’t make a mistake.” Then she said the same to me. 

Today, I got about 150 pages further in the book, as I actually do nothing at work, and am now into the stage where the corps members are seeing results. It’s uplifting after all the crap they’ve been through, but still tough to read. I mean, at this point, I feel like I can’t turn down the offer, but it’s so hard to say yes to something that I know at some point will cause me to say, “Why the hell did I sign up for this?”

To me, it feels like I have to choose between feeling underutilized, bored, and powerless and feeling challenged, stressed, and tired (all. the. time. according to most former corps members.) In the book, one of the male corps members who admitted to crying on the drive home some days said, even after all that, he still wouldn’t trade places with his friends, who, according to him, were working low level jobs as “glorified salesmen” and spent their days bored out of their minds. And right now, I’m feeling the same way, because my main complaint at every job I’ve had (besides camp) has been boredom and the feeling that I’m too smart to spend my day making copies and answering phones. Why would I turn down a job where I get to be in charge 95% of the time, where I get to lead a group of people, where I get to use every skill I’ve amassed over my life? Plus, there’s that whole job security thing. 

Tonight, 256 pages into the book, I went to the matriculation dinner, which was basically a free dinner at a delicious Italian restaurant with TFA alumni and the recently accepted, soon-to-be corps members. I really connected with a girl who taught 7th grade literacy in New York. We talked about her classroom management strategy, finding your teaching style, and what books her kids liked to read. (Unsurprisingly, they were all addicted to Twilight.) I could see myself in her, and I could see myself having the same struggles she described, but also the same successes. She helped me see myself doing this more clearly. I told her I wanted to teach middle school over high school, and she assured me that as that is rarely the case, I would probably get to teach middle school if I made my preference known. That helped calm my nerves about potentially being stuck in a class with 12th graders barely two years younger than me. 

Tomorrow, I have my last round of TFA investigation. I’m going on a school visit to a KIPP middle school outside the city. Hopefully, once I’m there, I will really be able to envision what my life would be like if I click that ominous “Accept Offer” button. I’m so close to being there, but I just want to be sure.

2) My job. 

3) The multitude of NPR podcasts I listen to while walking to and from said job and class. (Although, if you aren’t listening to Wait, Wait…Don’t Tell Me, This American Life, Fresh Air, and It’s All Politics, you are missing out on a lot of excitement and a lot of information that will help you feel superior to all those who waste their time listening to music while walking. Losers.) 

4) My working out. (Arms. So. Sore. Hate. Weights. So. Much.)

5) My excessive Food Network viewing schedule. (I do take breaks to switch over to TLC for Jon and Kate Plus 8 and  Take Home Chef, although these do not feel like much of a departure.) 

And all of these things that are too boring to blog about are pretty much my entire life right now. Jealous? 

Wait! I do have a small exciting story that is semi-related to me, but that highlights the lack of excitement in my life, as it is the most exciting story I have, and it didn’t even happen to me. Anyway, my sister got to go see David Sedaris in NYC yesterday. I was (slash am) super jealous because although he is coming to Harvard tomorrow, I cannot go see him, because they are stupid and sold tickets to the event, which are now sold out. Suck it, Harvard. My sister said he was great, so I started to think maybe I should just go stand outside the Harvard Bookstore, where they will have an audio feed, and then wait for hours to get my book signed. Better than nothing, right? I ran this by my sister, and she told me I shouldn’t get the new book signed because she may or may not have already gotten one for me. Win! I love my sister. She then told me that when she told David Sedaris about my sold-out-tickets-suck-it-Harvard situation, he said that he hates when book stores sell tickets to his events. Hah! David hates Harvard too! So I will soon have my own signed copy of David Sedaris’ new book, and I currently have the knowledge that David Sedaris feels for me. Double win! That is all.